Another Reason I Hate Manchester United

Apparently, one hundred thousand pounds per week can't buy decent clothing. Nice jacket, Carrick. Or should I say, Robocop.

No, this won't be a numbered list outlining why I hate this team. No one would really be interested in that. This is actually just another rant about Manchester United's tendency to throw huge parties but not invite the WAGs. This doesn't imply that no women are there; they invite tons of hot women (models, shop girls, etc.), but specify that the wives and girlfriends should not attend.

They most famously did it in December 2007, where horrors such as an Elvis impression by Ryan Giggs were par for the course. But no, that isn't the worst thing that happened all night: Johnny Evans (red circle) was arrested for allegedly sexually assaulting a 26 year old woman. My favourite descriptions of the evening:
"Irish joker O'Shea propped up the free bar ordering beer and champagne - and lifting up the skirts of passing girls." (Yeah, what a joker, sounds like good-natured fun to me. Oh yeah, and isn't this a little eerie that this is exactly what Tim O'Shea is like in my novel?)
"It was horrible. This guy had been pestering me and my friends for ages trying to get us up to a bedroom. I kept telling him no but he just wouldn't take it. He was really drunk as were the rest of them. Then he just grabbed me and started to drag me away from the main area towards the toilets. Thankfully the security man spotted what was going on and came to my help. I was so relieved to see him. I was in tears. The players were treating girls like pieces of meat. It was like a horrendous cattle market." (Note: this isn't the girl that was allegedly raped. It was another.)
"Some of his (Wayne Rooney's) colleagues were gyrating sexily with partners on the dimly-lit main dancefloor while others headed to the balcony upstairs for a sneaky snog." (The Mirror)

Does this all sound tame? Yeah, that's because Ronniekins wasn't there. If he had been, I'm sure that I would be quoting a five-prostitute orgy scandal.

They did it again on Saturday night after securing their third Premiership title in a row (fuck that). While no sexual assaults have been reported, the following details have emerged:
"It was an open bar upstairs in the VIP, so everyone was sloshed. No WAGs were in attendance. Cristiano was hanging out downstairs with the Portuguese massive having a great time beckoning wagabees (note: WAG Wannabees) over. There was some sort of pushy-shovey skirmish between G-Nevs and a “fat man” - people had to hold him back. Wayne Rooney disappeared into the casino on his own do do a little high rolling. And, Ryan Giggs let loose on the dance floor when the Happy Monday’s Step On came on." (Kickette)

In what world is this acceptable? How would you feel if your partner said "Hey honey, I'm going to a work party, you're not allowed to go but there will be models there throwing themselves at us. Don't mind any rumours about sexual assault and the like."
It is so unfair what these wives have to put up with. Just because their husbands provide for them financially does not give them license to act however they want. This is so horrifying.

I mention this because, as I have said, a similar thing is going to happen in my novel. Thank you United, for being a bunch of sleazy jackasses: you are my inspiration.